City2Surf

So next week is the big City2Surf trip with the girls.  I remember us all being so excited when we booked this as our first all girls weekend away.  I remember the enthusiasm, the trying to talk everyone into it, the planning, the confusion, the trying to find accommodation to suit all, the dramas and the self talk and doubt.  One of the main things I clearly remember was the camaraderie we all felt, how close we all felt as a group of aspiring 14km runners.

That was months ago now and finally we all agreed on accommodation, all five of us committed by buying our entry and booking flights and even then booking seats on the plane.  Two of us booking bridge climb others umming and ahhhing on whether to do it or not but finally deciding it was not for them for their own reasons.

I have to say up until a few weeks back this was one of the most exciting things I was looking forward to this year.  But as it gets closer it's appeal is not the same.  The voice of self doubt is creeping in, the feelings that things may change between us all as this chapter of our lives is completed and waiting to discover what chapters will come afterwards.  Will I finish the 14km and finish it well, have I trained a little better, am I nourishing my body, have I made enough changes to do this and not let the demons enter mid race for too long and to win.

Have you ever been so excited for something for so long that the closer it comes the more you feel as nervous as you were excited?  I hope that during this week I can squash the demons and allow the angels to fly.